


Uncountable

by dedicatedfollower467



Series: Time has Brought Your Heart to Me [2]
Category: Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, Classic Doctor Who References, Regeneration Angst (Doctor Who), The Vault (Doctor Who), but you don't need to know any Classic Who to get it, can be read as gen or shippy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-12
Updated: 2019-01-12
Packaged: 2019-10-08 15:43:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17389166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dedicatedfollower467/pseuds/dedicatedfollower467
Summary: It occurred to him one night that he had no idea how many times she'd regenerated.





	Uncountable

**Author's Note:**

> I'm posting this as the first fic in what will likely eventually become a much longer series. I wrote this last summer when I was binge-watching both Twelve's seasons and some Classic Who. There's more to come.
> 
> Enjoy!

It occurred to him one night, as he leaned his forehead against the door to the Vault but couldn’t quite work up the courage to tell Missy he’d brought her Chinese take-out, that he had no idea how many times she’d regenerated.

He knew, back when he was still in his third body and exiled to Earth and the Master had come around to pester him and cheer him up, that his old friend had been on their thirteenth and final incarnation and absolutely desperate for another body. The first time, finding a way to cheat death had seemed difficult. But now, the Doctor almost considered it a matter of course that the Master would return.

And now he was in the same boat; new regeneration cycle and a new set of bodies to work with, but how many had he been granted? Did he know if he was going to last another dozen bodies, or was this the last shot he had? Would he spend the rest of his lives wondering if this was to be his last?

Missy rapped hard on the other side of the door. “If you’re coming in, come _in_ ,” she ordered.

“How many regenerations is this for you, then?” he asked as he reluctantly stepped into the Vault.

She blinked at him, and he realized that she was dressed down - as much as was possible for Missy. Her curled hair was loose around her shoulders, she’d removed a few layers of clothing, so she was in only her chemise and petticoat, and her stocking-feet tucked neatly under her rear where she was sitting on the ground.

He instantly regretted asking the question and tried to backtrack. “Oh, never mind, it’s not important -”

“I lost count,” she said, clear in the echoing cavern of the Vault.

Now it was his turn to blink, looking at her. “What do you mean, you lost count?”

She pulled her legs up in front of her and wrapped her arms around her knees. “Oh I’m sure if I thought about it really hard I could figure out the number,” she said. “But really, what counts as regeneration? _Every_ time I’ve come back from the dead, or just the times I changed bodies? What about the times I possessed someone else’s body? Does my disembodied floating spirit count as a regeneration?”

She hugged herself even more tightly and began to rock back and forth. “You’re on, what, number fourteen?” she asked flippantly, but her limbs were shaking. “Lucky the Time Lords were so desperate for your help, eh?”

He abandoned the takeout at the door and crossed the room, dropping to his knees in front of her. When she looked up he gently placed his hands on the tops of her feet.

“It doesn’t matter,” he said. “It’s not important. I’m sorry.”

Tears glistened in her eyes, and he could see her swallowing and biting her lips to keep them from falling. “I should know though,” she said. “I ought to know what the fuck has happened to me.”

A sound filled both their minds then, an echo, a memory - hers. The loud _rat-a-tat-tat!_ of war drums nearly drowned out all other sensation. He could barely see her through the ache of the noise.

“No,” he said, and curled his hands around her. “No, Missy, don’t listen to them, listen to me. They’re not here, they’re not real. I am. I’m here. I’ve got you.”

She shoved his hands off and threw herself backwards, hair falling in a ragged cascade into her face as she drew her knees back to her chest and began to claw at her own skin.

“Why do you _care!_ ” she snarled. “After everything I’ve done, why do you still _care_ about me?”

He looked at her helplessly, on his knees, hands limp at his sides.

“Because you’re my friend,” he said. “Maybe the only one I’ve got left.”

“I’m not the little boy you knew at the Academy anymore, Theta.”

He crawled the few steps towards her. “Neither am I, Koschei,” he said.

“I’ll break your heart,” she warned.

“So will I.”

She laughed, wild and frantic. “Too late for that.”

When he took her hands, this time, she didn’t pull away.


End file.
